dear children

Oh dear children of mine. My beautiful angels from Heaven. Mommy’s got a couple of things she’d like to review with you one LAST time. And by that, I mean I never, ever want to have to say these things again. Ever!

  • “Wash your hands & flush the toilet.” No, you didn’t. Fine let me smell your hands.
  • “When I say it’s bedtime, it’s bedtime. Now goodnight.” Dammit!
  • “Cover your mouth when you cough.” No, you didn’t & now I’m sick.
  • “Yes, you need to brush your teeth.” Oh you did? That’s not mint I smell.
  • “Eat over your plate.” Oh you are? Then what’s the dog eating off the floor?
  • “Smaller bites *please!*” Really? Cause a hot dog should take more than 3 bites.
  • “Chew with your mouth closed!” No, you’re not. I see hamburger.

You got it? We good?

Great! Now go out and tackle the world my sweet, little angels.