hunting unicorns while eating cake & drinking beer

I knew traveling to visit my sister in Germany for an early celebration of my 40th was going to be fun. It would be an escape from all of my reality…the job, the kids, the husband, the sporting events, the minivan driving, the grocery shopping, the cooking, the cleaning, the all of it.  What I didn’t know was how silly all of it would be. I didn’t realize the funny things we would encounter. The gut aching laughs. The pee’ing of the pants (hypothetically*). And I sure didn’t know I’d come home with the head of a unicorn.

Meet Friedrich. A strong German unicorn now making his home in the States.

Friedrich

Maybe I should eh’splain…A big part of the trip was wandering around German “w”illages, eating cake and drinking beer. (Not together, cause eeeewww GROSS!)  In between the cake eating and the beer drinking, we were shopping. Or I was. I was forcing my sister into store after store after store. She was along for the ride. Until we came across these,

thewall

and then she was all in. Our reaction? Sudden silence. Then rapid head turns toward each other, shared looks of WTF and then bent over laughter with legs crossed to prevent the pee’ing of the pants*.

What is this? Why is there a wall of stuffed heads? Is this what Germans hang in their homes as a welcome? “Hi, I went mastodon hunting last week and look at my catch!”

I was immediately drawn to the unicorn. Cause who wouldn’t be? And my immediate reaction was “I MUST HAVE THIS!” My sister’s immediate reaction “ARE YOU INSANE?” She followed that up with “This isn’t normal! This isn’t German! We don’t all have these hanging in our homes!” To which I reacted “Uh, huh. Please stop talking cause I can’t handle this and my almost 40 year old bladder is gonna BAH-REAK!” In my head I’m all, “This is the best moment of my life!!!!!”

we meet

I told my sister I must have this unicorn head, to which she looked at me with the “you are easily the craziest sister anyone in the whole-wide-world could ever have. God, I’m beyond blessed that you are MY sister” look in her eyes and said calmly, “This store is a chain so you don’t have to buy him today. We can buy him later in the trip, in another German “w”illage, in between our cake eating and beer drinking.”

Tears welled in my eyes and I said quietly, “okay.” Dreams crushed. Hearts broken. I walked outta that store sans unicorn head, having just experienced the best and the worst moments of my life. Goodbye unicorns. Goodbye most amazing thing I ever seen in all of my days. Goodbye…

As the days progressed and we wandered through other German “w”illages eating cake and drinking beer, we (okay, maybe just me) were blessed enough to come across the random stuffed heads a couple more times. The displays varied slightly; with this one easily being my favorite:

the pole

How often in life do you come across a cute little store with a whole POLE full of unicorn heads?? Right?? Almost never, ever. Germany must be the best country in all of the land!

My week away from my blessed reality was quickly approaching its end (noooooooo! Please God, nooooooo!), I forced my sister into the magical store one last time. The unicorn head was to be mine. I must have this! MUST! My logic: when back home, in my very own blessed reality, what could make me happier than a unicorn head staring down at me full of whimsy and magic? That’s right, nothing.

So I bought him. And forced my sister to take some photographs around the German “w”illage of the day…laughing harder than I’d laughed in a really, really long time. Being silly. With my sister. The magic of it all obviously brought on by the unicorn.

hes mine

inacafe

goingforaride

The Sister and I then stopped to have cake (cause we’d already drank beer) post unicorn purchase and the conversation turned serious. We (okay mostly me) decided we must name my new magical, mythical creature of magic. A strong German name. Bearing origination from his homeland.

Friedrich.

Friedrich now resides on the wall of my office. In my home. Staring down at me each and every day, with a bit of a snicker. Making me laugh and remember the most amazing trip I’ve had to Germany to date.

friedrichoffice

Now I say bring on 40! Cause I gots me a unicorn head hanging in my home to help me remember to be silly. To remember to laugh or not to focus too hard on the doldrums of my blessed reality. To laugh hard at myself being silly and laugh hard with those I love. Laugh so hard I pee my pants. Which seems to be getting easier and easier as 40 approaches! Hypothetically.*

*Also to note: No pants were actually ruined by the pee’ing of them during the #thisisalmost40adventure and the actual purchase of Friedrich. But it got real close. Dangerously close.